Quick update: cruising, reading and binge-watching

So, of course, after all those posts with specific purposes, I owe you an absolute mess of an update, since that’s what I’ve been doing with my blog for months and that’s what you have come to expect of me. So here I am.

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First update: Somehow (really, don’t ask me how) I am halfway done with my degree.

I reached 50% of my PharmD: I never thought I would reach this milestone so fast. I only have one year left of my didactic studies, after which I’ll work my ash off. I think this is the first actual break I have had ever since I started pharmacy school and I have really stopped to think: holy shirt how is this possible? I am honestly so proud of myself for coming this far. Especially, if you read my past posts, I had no idea what I would do with my life until my second year of my undergrad.

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Gente, llegamos al 50% 💃🏻

A post shared by natalie 🐬 (@fearlessly.nat) on Apr 30, 2019 at 2:44pm PDT

I went on a cruise with my friends.

That’s something I never thought I would ever do (I went on a cruise when I was way younger and my experience was not the best in terms of motion sickness), but here we were. It has been one of the most fun experiences I have ever gone through in my life. Going to piano bars? Listening to talented singers perform every night? Eating delicious food?

I am so glad I was able to do this with my classmates, as this is something we will remember for the rest of our lives, hopefully.

A stray thought: I can’t believe I’ve hopped on a plane more times in a year than I have my whole life. (hopefully I’ll be able to do it even more once I actually graduate and earn money O.o)

Another stray thought: Non-drowsy Dramamine is BS

As for reading (I had written “I am a disappointing mess on a previous draft”)

I finished Vengeful and Love and Other Words, two of the books I had started months ago. But the one I actually want to mention is Kingdom of Exiles.

Mo gave it a glowing recommendation and, as I tweeted this:

I just want everyone to know I trust Mo’s taste in books with my life.

— natalie (@fearlesslynat) June 12, 2019

 

I HAD to read it. And it was so good! The whole plot was amazing, and I always needed to know what would happen next. I buddy read it with Lee, and theorizing, screaming and fangirling with her was so much fun! I hope I can get to do it again when Frozen Prince comes out!

I’m currently waiting for Soul of Stars to come out and suffer.

Now, for the update you were (not) waiting for: TV and K-dramas!

I watched the entirety of Fleabag in a day. (Not going to lie- I watched it because of a specific Andrew Scott Tumblr giftset my friend sent me) And it was so much more than I expected! Quality comedy that can also make me cry.

Good Omens: My current obsession: I shall spend my whole life trying to get everyone to watch the masterpiece of Michael Sheen and David Tennant playing an angel and a demon, respectively. Plus, it was written by Neil Gaiman: WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR, PEOPLE?!

As for K-dramas:

-I’M IN LOVE WITH KIM JAE WOOK. Her Private Life wasn’t full of a mind-blowing plot or whatever, but it’s so cute and fangirly and my expectations for men kept skyrocketing.

–Angel’s Last Mission: Love– It’s so cute and my mom says it looks like City of Angels and if it is, I’ll cry. A LOT. But meanwhile I’ll have fun with their cute and amazing acting kbye. (And the plot is amazing, and I’m scared of how it will end. *cries*)

-And the one I love the most right now: Search: WWW. It’s such a feminist K-drama. Every single misogynistic trope is turned around, and I am living to see three powerful women take over the world. ❤

As for miscellaneous obsessions:

–Lore Olympus owns my life right now. That’s all I’ll say. ❤

 

Anyhow, here is your mess of an update! Hope you enjoyed it!

-Nat ❤

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“But I still have this faith in the truth of my dreams”

Hi, everyone. It’s been a while. (an understatement, but certainly not the longest time I have been without writing on this blog)

I have been busy. And then I wasn’t. I haven’t been busy for two weeks already and I haven’t been able to put everything that happened during the past 6 months in writing. I’m thinking I could divide everything in a couple of posts, so you’ll have some things to look forward to, if you like my writing. (which… I’m not sure it’s even possible) This post is about two dreams I was able to fulfill on this period of time, if you want to read it.

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Dream #1: The first time I visited Universal Studios in Orlando, years ago, The Wizarding World of Harry Potter was being announced as I was leaving. Middle-school Natalie felt sad (although that’s not strong enough of a word, I think). Through the years, as it opened, as my friends and classmates all posted pictures with Hogwarts, on Diagon Alley, or drinking butterbeer, I felt jealous. (I mean, I was happy for them in a way, but I wanted to see what it felt.) When my friend told me she wanted to visit a mutual friend who studies in Orlando during spring break, I did not miss the chance: I said yes. Enthusiastically. We would figure out the logistics on the way. And we did.

Believe me, there were A LOT of roadblocks, beginning with the tickets we bought and apparently someone had reprinted 4 times. (But that’s another story, although if you followed me on Snapchat that day, the rants were REAL) However, it was an amazing experience to visit the place I dreamed of with my best friend. I still get teary-eyed thinking of how it felt to see Hogwarts for the first time.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BunKhv6FugH/

It was also amazing to meet my friend’s classmates who did everything to make us feel welcome. I will always feel thankful for everything. For taking us to eat Korean BBQ for the first time (it was amazing, thanks for asking). For watching Twilight with us (my friend’s first time).

Of course, my immune system could not stay put and I got sick during the trip. What I thought was a regular cold turned out to be… *drumrolls* influenza!

Update: the cold ended up being influenza.

Get vaccinated, folks. https://t.co/MLrv7UxVhn

— natalie (@fearlesslynat) March 9, 2019

So, you guessed right: a spring break that was going to last a week lasted half a month that felt like forever, after which it was extremely difficult to catch up on my university’s responsibilities. Anyhow, I survived, the semester ended, and dream #2 was about to be fulfilled.

*Making a note here: if you can get a flu vaccine, please do. Although you can still get the flu, the chances of getting it and the severity of the infection could decrease.

For some background into dream #2: If you follow me online, you’ll know I have been obsessed with Anastasia: The Musical since *looks on Twitter* probably November 2017.

I have loved the animated movie since earlier:

Listening to “Once Upon A December”
I love #Anastasia!! ❤

— natalie (@fearlesslynat) July 30, 2012

(but let’s move on). I wanted to see it with my own eyes, so when it was announced that its Broadway run would end, I was devastated:

I keep seeing the Anastasia Broadway cast goodbye posts and pic.twitter.com/sB1fMm9iz2

— natalie (@fearlesslynat) March 30, 2019

As you know, although it closed, there is a tour traveling through the US. And casually (I still cannot believe this), it would stop on Fort Lauderdale during my finals and through the beginning of May. Which meant that I had a (small) chance of seeing it before I went on a cruise trip with my class friends. However, I did not realize this until I had a conversation with my school friends. They encouraged me to buy tickets, and then told me they would go with me. Which meant ABSOLUTELY THE WORLD and I will always appreciate. So I can say I watched Anastasia, I listened to my favorite songs live and sang along from the very last row and enjoyed it all.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BygOmYSn9YF/

I almost cried listening to In a Crowd of Thousands live. And In My Dreams. And Quartet at the Ballet (These three were always my favorites, and will remain like that for the rest of time) The Countess and the Common Man, though. This performance GAVE ME LIFE. (The touring cast is so talented, guys.)

There’s something to be said about the feeling of seeing a dream fulfilled. Of course, I have new and unfinished ones, (Seeing Hadestown and graduating Pharmacy school come to mind), and I cannot wait to do it all. And to take you all with me.

-Nat ❤

To a long lost friend

This post is a little bit different. It’s a letter -kind of like the one I posted years ago– These are the things I want to tell someone who hasn’t been in my life in a long time, but I miss them so much sometimes that I wish I could see them at least one more time.

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Hi, friend.

It has definitely been a while. I’ve asked a lot of people about you and no one seems to know anything. I wonder if you are okay, if you have finally found what you wanted to do with your life, or if you always knew and never shared it with the world. You never shared many of your thoughts and dreams, only pieces. I probably overshared, but you always -or at least most of the time, when we weren’t fighting- listened.

I remember our last conversation- or at least where it was and how it felt. Do you? Probably not- I’m well aware you were a bigger part of my life than I was of yours. It felt peaceful, friendly again, like it hadn’t been in almost a year -or probably more. Sadly, I do not remember what we talked about- it has been 5 years since that day, and I would have paid more attention to it if I had known I wouldn’t see you again.

I wonder if you know that I do not want to be a doctor anymore -or at least a medical doctor, and that I’m studying to be a pharmacist. Can you believe this? -I most certainly wouldn’t… Did you hear about that?

I wonder if you know that I finally got to go to a Taylor Swift concert! That I made my dream come true- I remember you bought me Speak Now as a birthday gift-, and that I faced my fear of traveling alone. I wonder if you know that I don’t read as much anymore, that I don’t have the time, and that this makes me so sad I want to cry sometimes.

I wonder if you know how much I appreciated our friendship- no matter how much we fought- and that you are one of the people I care the most for, even after 5 years.

Anyway, I miss you. And part of the reason I keep my social media updated and public is because if you somehow found me, you’d be able to know how I’ve been, if you cared. Now that I think about it, it seems like a lomg shot. You abandoned social media long ago, and it seems unlikely that you would come back, but still. Hope never dies, I guess.

I hope to see you again someday, and that I get to tell you these things in person. I miss you so much!

Natalie

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(And I just realized this post sounds like they’re dead. For the record- no, they’re not. They just haven’t been in my life for years, and I am pretty sure I won’t ever see them again.)

 

Bye bye, 2016.

2016, a year for the books, right? I’ve been thinking a lot about what to write… and now that we’re two hours away from saying goodbye (here in Puerto Rico, as I’m writing this), I guess it’s time to think about what happened to me during this… eventful year. Shall we?

This will be sort of a numbered post since I don’t have much time… 😀

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1. First sleepover: Some of you will roll your eyes to the back of your head with this… but this was a milestone for me. Being invited let alone the fact that I was allowed to go? That was huge for me. That was one of the best nights of my life. I’m so glad it happened.
2. PCAT: I took it. I survived. And I’m currently waiting after I submitted an application to a pharmacy school. Is this scary or what? That was also the time of my second sleepover. Will there be a time where I stop counting them?
3. Time to get my GPA up! And it did. It totally did and now I’m finally competitive enough for at least a chance. I’m so happy… even though might not be enough, I’m still up for a fight.
4. Turning 21: It was not as exciting as how many people experience. Probably because I don’t drink? But it was still a milestone. And what made it a happy day for me was that my friends actually remembered and made it special.
5. And as for the sad part, more death in my family. I still have no clue why this all keeps happening… but it did. Again. And the distance between my extended family and I feels kind of unsurmountable right now. Let’s hope for new beginnings next year? 
6. (NOT) finishing my goal amount of books? I accepted some months ago that I wouldn’t make it this year. These past semesters were kind of brutal… I am lucky I could finish SOME books… I’m hoping this perpetual slump could end ANY minute now…
7. Becoming obsessed with k-Dramas. It was bound to happen. *shrugs* I can’t imagine myself without them now.
8. Speaking of obsessions…

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I wanted to say something else, too, before the year ends. I missed lots of things, things I could have blogged about… and I did not. I could say I did my best for my blog, but I didn’t. I am not going to promise to post more. It would be pointless… But I’m still going to try. I deserve it, and you deserve it too. 2017 is so important, you see. I FINALLY graduate during next year! And whatever happens… I want to share this next stage with you all. Like I said, I’m going to try. Let’s see how it goes.

Signing off for the year;

Nat.

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P.S. 2016 IS FINALLY OVER, BITCHES!!!

Apologies.

Greetings. *dances my way into your Reader*

I’m back. You didn’t expect to hear (or read, for that matter) from me so soon, did you? *winks* I’m pretty sure this post won’t be as messy as the last one.

I also forgot to acknowledge that my (second!!) blogging anniversary was this past August. This has been a wild ride and I can’t wait for what awaits us, my dear followers!

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I have been thinking a lot about apologies and forgiveness lately. Sincere apologies are hard to come up with, unless you’re talking about me. (read my previous posts, for example. You’ll see most of them tagged with some sort of apology. 🙂 )

Me, 99.9% of the time.

I apologize about literally everything, from sneezing to accidentally bumping with someone. It’s second nature to me. It’s a wonder I don’t apologize for breathing!

There were lots of times when I apologized for things that were either:

1. Outside my control
2. Part of who I am as a person

I have recently understood why I’m like this. It has to do with the fact that I always believed I was less than everyone else. Less smart, less clever, less funny. I felt like everyone had this chip or programming that helped them act on certain situations, and I didn’t. Others simply knew better and I had no choice but to follow. I did not understand why people acted in a certain way.

It was frustrating to always wonder why I was alone. This was why I felt like I did not deserve to have friends (or at least, that I had to come out of my usual behavior or way of thinking to have them.) I felt like I had to apologize for simply hanging out with them. Or stop being myself, in a way. More than one person has expressed their concern about this to me. Someone literally said they hated hearing the words “I’m sorry” from me.

their reaction when I immediately apologized for apologizing too much

And I got why. Eventually.

“Apologizing does not always mean you’re wrong and the other person is right. It just means you value your relationship more than your ego.”
― Mark Matthews

This quote has much to do with my previous MO when it came to apologies (even though I hadn’t read it before researching for this post). I say previous, because these past few years, I’ve learned a LOT about myself. I’ve learned what I like and what I don’t. Most important of all, I’ve learned that I don’t like feeling like less than other people. And most of the time I valued relationships/friendships more than I valued myself! I did not realize how much I was hurting myself. Having to apologize frequently… it took a bit of myself every time I did it.

Don’t get me wrong, there are times when an apology is needed. When not apologizing makes you literally an asshole. The person who apologizes shouldn’t feel pressed by the one who will receive the apology, though. (By this, I mean: you can tell the person directly that you feel hurt by what they did… after explaining what they did. But the apology should come directly from that person.) The whole point of the apology is that it has to be genuine, sincere… and pushing someone to apologize would take that away from it. It would be wrong, in a way.

Still, an apology is always a good way to fix things, and it’s nice to know that a genuine one can help rebuild a relationship. 🙂

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I am aware that this post might make me sound sort of selfish, but I’ve realized these things about myself along the way… and this blog is all about discovering myself. It’s interesting how, even being almost 21 years old, I keep discovering things I did not know, and somehow growing into a person I did not expect becoming… even though I sometimes realize I’m not as good a person as I thought before. Thanks for reading! 

Any thoughts? Suggestions? The comments are open! 🙂

Sleepovers, Scares and Staying at a Hotel

Well, people, it’s been a while…

 

I’m blogging from my study cave. (Yes, you read me right. Studying. In July… but don’t be sad for me, I literally started studying today. I’m okay, and procrastinating healthily while blogging) The time has come to prepare myself for the PCAT… a test that will probably define my whole future, but no big deal! *laughs nervously*

Being an adult is scary. I’m not even kidding, I haven’t been more nervous than the night I applied to take the PCAT. It’s not that bad, though. I don’t exactly have to get up early, which means I can work with my schedule, and I plan on studying with my friends. My vacations haven’t exactly been uneventful. I got really scared for a week or two while I didn’t know if I would have to get surgery… If you follow me on Twitter, you’ll know that it was, thankfully, a false alarm, and I got off with a December appointment and an order to exercise and eat better… (bye bye, pizza weekends!) … Right after I got that order I went to an hotel and basically broke that rule for two whole days, but I was saying goodbye! Don’t judge! 😀

 

(Yes, that’s my hair. Yes, that’s Graceling, AKA my favorite book in the whole world) I posted most of my pictures/videos on Snapchat (fearlesslynat, like the blog, just in case you were wondering :D)

These past days were amazing… And they weren’t the only thing I’ve done this summer! I finally had my first sleepover at María‘s on her birthday, and it was fairly one of the best days ever 🙂

 

 

 

Now that I told you about everything that has happened, more or less, I guess I can also tell you about movies/books/tv shows, right?

A month ago I told you I was watching Les Interpretes, right? It had a kind of disappointing ending, to be honest. It had such a promising beginning, and it had to end like that… *groans*. I wasn’t expecting more of the other one I was watching, which was good, because the ending wasn’t good, either. That’s why I ended up watching Descendants of the Sun… twice. Now I’m watching Beautiful Mind, Doctors and Lucky Romance… which are good… so far. I am up to date with Game of Thrones as well, which means I can read Pat‘s posts without fear of spoilers. Life is good, really.

I’ve also tried to catch up with my reading… but I only read Lady Midnight (I finished it!!) and started Graceling. I’m waiting for my friend to give A Court of Mist and Fury to me… I’m really excited about it because (1) Sarah J. Maas, duh. and (2) IT’S SIGNED! Which is basically a dream come true… although I still want to meet her someday.

Anyway, I think this was a nice update, and hopefully I’ll meet you again soon while I try to distract myself from Biology and *shudders* organic chemistry… *waves*

Don’t mind me, I was just imagining dragons last night.

*logs into WordPress after 3 weeks of inactivity, hiding*

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Well hello, everyone, if there’s any people still watching for my posts. *looks around*

I guess it’s time for an update, right? Sorry for not posting anything (even quotes), in a while. I had even signed myself up for the Writing 101 course but wasn’t able to follow it. This past month has been quite stressful. (And finals are coming in a month. That is scary.)

So, you came here for a (fun) blog post, right? I went to the Imagine Dragons concert yesterday with my best friend and it was amazing. It could be considered one of the highlights of the year for me. I was really tired as I had gone to Uni to give a presentation and take a class, but it was so worth it. Dan Reynolds’ voice is something else. I am so happy I was able to go… even if we arrived home at 1am and my brother had a standardized test today. (Selfish, I know.)

I arrived at the train station 2 hours before the concert was about to start, which is reasonable… and I got in the train, without really knowing where I was getting off. Yep. I could have called anyone and I didn’t, oh well. So… as you could have guessed, I missed my stop. When I saw the Choliseo while I was staring outside my window, this was my (mental) reaction:

To the people that aren’t mind readers, this was me, especially after the station announced that it would be out of service as soon as the train arrived:

I soon realized the same thing had happened to the people around me, and then one of the employees approached us, telling us we could aboard the other train, and we could get in time for the concert. For us, at least, it felt like this:

They were fun people, at least, so we spent the next fifteen minutes or so joking about how we couldn’t travel to Paris if we couldn’t even get to the Choliseo the right way. Then we got to the right station, and I never saw them again. Well, it was fun while it lasted.

In case you’re wondering, this is the Choliseo.

I got there with an hour or so to spare, and I had to wait for my friend, so I walked around… met a Twitter friend, and sat down, all the while there was a truck playing Imagine Dragons songs. That certainly made the waiting  more bearable.

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Around half an hour before the concert was going to start, my friend finally arrived. And we bought matching T-shirts.

Una noche brutal e inolvidable 🙌😍 [Nuestras camisetas >>>] 💙 #ImagineDragons #Concert pic.twitter.com/R5WvzA2CdV

— Sora ✌ (@Alemmanuel9) April 24, 2015

The rest is history, and it is recorded in the hundreds (or even thousands) of tweets and pictures that were sent during the concert.

Just a little piece of Radioactive! Best night of my freaking life @Imaginedragons #ImagineDragons pic.twitter.com/AkAmi7ethI

— Paola (@_paola_bonilla) April 24, 2015

The best moment of the night 😻 @PRDragons @Imaginedragons #ImagineDragonsPR pic.twitter.com/hVDZLkkCIT

— Amanda☠ (@_amandamunoz) April 24, 2015

+Puerto Rico+ pic.twitter.com/zNU6tswEax

— Imagine Dragons (@Imaginedragons) April 24, 2015

If you have the option to go to one of their concerts, do it. You most definitely will NOT regret it.

Here’s to Blogging 101… and New Friends!! :)

Blogging 101 is over, guys. It’s sad, but everything must end sometime, right? It was one of the best experiences I have ever had.

Something to have in perspective: I gained more views/followers this past month than the ones I did on 2014. Granted, I began blogging in August, but still, it’s something to consider. Having feedback from other bloggers made me realize that I have my own writing style, and that some people are actually willing to listen to what I want to say.

My blog also looks way better! 😉

A lot of my fellow bloggers followed every single one of the assignments (Something I sadly couldn’t do), and won lots of followers! I want to congratulate them. I did get some myself. I feel good, I feel… accomplished, even if I do have a long way to go.

I learned so much during these past few days. I met lots of amazing people that I will definitely keep in touch with, and became a better blogger because of them. (I want to believe that)

I also want to acknowledge some of the best people I met during Blogging 101. They were always there to support me, and to give me some much needed feedback. My new friends:

• Sam Rappaz
• Desley Jane
• Faraday’s Candle (I must admit I read it like “castle” the first time I saw their UN)
• My Lost Lexicon
• A Girl in Glasses
• Jonathan

… And many others that I sadly can’t remember right now!! Last month was amazing thanks to all of you. I hope you stay here and that we all get to read more of each other’s writing… ❤

LoveLoveLove,

Nat x

Life is… good!

Hi, there! These past few days have been… good! *insert the song Miracles Happen from The Princess Diaries*

This is Kiara 🙂

Okay, as you probably know, my family has gone through a lot during the past month, but everything’s coming together in the best way. My uncle recently woke up after being intubated for about 2 weeks and is going to be sent to a normal hospital room soon. My family’s so happy right now. Now we’re waiting for my other aunt to get better. We have faith. 🙂

Yesterday, I went out with my friends after spending a couple of hours at college officially enrolling myself in my courses. We were going to watch The Hobbit, but the mall’s cinema wasn’t showing it. It was sad, but we spent some time at the mall’s bookstore. It was amazing. I also saw Kiara from Oh, Read it in A Day again. 🙂

(By the way, guys, another miracle happened. My schedule for next semester was a bit crazy. I had to spend 13 hours at Uni on Wednesdays because of my Organic Chem lab. I wasn’t able to change that until Monday night, when my friend tweeted about the system being open… And I checked. There was a space on the section I wanted and I basically don’t have to wait until 4pm to take my class. Which is great!)

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You might notice that the theme’s different. I’m trying new things, and the theme is one of them. I kind of like it, but I have to get used to the pink highlights. I was thinking about a new header, but I’m still working on it. I have a few ideas, though.

Anyhow, I have been catching up with the Blogging 101 assignments and commenting on a few posts I like. Discovering new blogs and making friends is one of my favorite things ever.

Just a reminder: if you want me to write a guest blog post for you, or want to write one yourself, you can comment on any of my posts, tweet me or send me an email. My info is in one of the widgets at the sidebar! 🙂