“I’m Alive!”-Sia

*runs towards all of you, screaming “I am NOT GONE yet!”*

Hello! Long time, no see… (Since Valentine’s Day! Whoa…) *wonders if people are still interested in my posts*

This semester was draining… but good results came from it, so that’s great! *smiles at my brand new GPA*

Summer has now arrived (finally, after finals were postponed a week because of my uni’s strike…*), and with it a sense of happiness and peace I hadn’t felt since forever. Incredibly, I have not finished any books (apart from one I read during finals but that one didn’t count), so if you have any suggestions as to what in the world I can do to get rid of this horrible reading slump, they are mostly welcome. A little more than a month ago I tweeted a poll (see below)

and I still have to keep my word. I’ll keep you posted on if I like Lady Midnight. I’ve been trying to listen to the audiobook… (trying being the main word. Perhaps it will work when I start working out this summer? Only time will tell)

Since I can’t read much because of the slump, I’ve been watching Korean dramas. My mother basically passed on her addiction to me. I’ve been also watching Les Interprètes, a Chinese drama, which is SO GOOD (and extremely addicting, so please do NOT do as I did and watch it slowly. Do not binge on 14 episodes in one day. It’s not healthy and you’ll run out of episodes soon.) I did not think I would enjoy something like this so much, but I love how it involves both languages in such a natural way!

A lot of things have also happened. My dad came here for 2 weeks… during which I was on my finals so I did not get to spend as much time as I wanted with him (boo…) BUT he did promise he would try to come here more often. I was not able to go to my brother’s graduation (Thanks, Developmental biology) BUT I did get a good grade on the class so it was (kind of) worth it.

In other words, I’m free, like Dobby (for the next 2 months, anyway), even though I plan on studying for the PCAT. *crosses fingers* I also have other plans for this summer… I hope I can do it all… (And keep this blog more updated, hopefully.)

*I guess that would have been a good topic for a blog post… but I did tweet about a lot of my thoughts… xD

P.S. Do you all like my new blog layout? I’m trying some things out. 🙂

 

 

oh. It’s another post about love.

For a person who doesn’t know romantic love at all I surely write a lot about it…   I tried to prepare myself to write this with my romantic playlist.

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Yes, this is an Anna and the French Kiss quote. It’s one of my favorite romantic books and Etienne St. Clair is one of the main reasons I have so many unrealistic expectations.

But then again, it’s Valentine’s Day! My Uni’s celebration was last Thursday, so everyone had it in mind –including my professors. You could feel the love in the air… or at least the smell of the roses and chocolate people were giving each other because they think they are in love.

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Something like this?

My professor said something about this. Being in love isn’t the same thing than actually loving someone. Loving is a choice. You will eventually lose those neurotransmitters that made you attracted to the person in the first place. You will need to find tangible reasons to stay with them, and consciously decide to do it.

“I fell in love with him. But I don’t just stay with him by default as if there’s no one else available to me. I stay with him because I choose to, every day that I wake up, every day that we fight or lie to each other or disappoint each other. I choose him over and over again, and he chooses me.”
― Veronica Roth, Allegiant

Incredibly, that was not the first time this week I heard something like this. I had a conversation with someone that made me think about this… someone who said had always believed marriage was forever, but does not think so anymore. Marriage is hard, and it’s not only about love, but an actual compromise. It’s about being the person’s best friend, about never letting go, even if sometimes you might think you want to.**

**Not talking about abuse here (emotional or physical). Health is more important than having a partner who doesn’t appreciate you. Just wanted to make this clear. I was just talking about the times when you might think nothing is left but being next to each other for the rest of your lives.

“It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.”
― Friedrich Nietzsche

I have always thought serious conversations must be had in early stages of the relationship, unless you want a deal-breaker event to suddenly appear just before getting married or even after. For example, I don’t think I will ever want children of my own. (Not because I don’t like children in general, I just don’t believe I will be good for them). That’s something I will have to talk over with my future partner… and make some accords with him, just as there will be things about him that we’ll have to talk about. And that’s okay… nothing and no one is perfect and will ever be.

 “You don’t love someone because they’re perfect, you love them in spite of the fact that they’re not.”
― Jodi Picoult, My Sister’s Keeper

I don’t ever want to become one of these people who don’t believe love is not real, because deep in my heart, I know it is. (even if some of the time, I am also this person)

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I believe in hard work, in showing with actions how much you actually love them. Don’t get me wrong –roses and chocolates are definitely nice, but when it becomes a mindless exercise, when you don’t give the actual giving part much thought, that becomes the problem. I have always believed Valentine’s Day is meaningless if you don’t show the person you love how much you love them during the other 364 –sorry, 365 on this year –days of the year. Be it with some help, with a kiss, with a hug, with some words written on a card (or even a funny video!), don’t stop making the choice of being in love with the person next to you. Believe me, coming from a person who has never gone through any of it, you’re experiencing a true blessing.

New y- semester, new me!

Greetings, Earthlings (I’ve officially ran out of ways to greet you, guys. I need to brainstorm)

I haven’t seen you all since… my birthday, isn’t it?

The truth is… that not much has happened since then. This Christmas was bound to be kind of hard because of all the things that happened last year, but life goes on! *shrugs*. I did spend my whole break at home watching Netflix (I finished Buffy! That’s something! I’m still behind on House of Cards and Merlin, so shh with the spoilers!) and movies (like Star Wars. I still have to watch the original trilogy, Episodes VI and VII. I need TIME!). I didn’t read much, except for rereading the Shatter Me trilogy and the Throne of Glass books… I did go out with my friends on a hike. It was fun, but my legs hurt like crazy for the next week or so. Exercising this year is a MUST!

(When did WordPress create this collage thing, anyway? It is so cool!)

I guess the thing that changed the most was the fact that I decided to change my study (and general) habits for the better. I know, I know, I always say this. There’s always a start, and this is mine. I won’t take Physics this semester, but I’ll take Developmental Biology… which apparently is kind of hard? I’m hoping I can survive and live to tell the tale, like I always end up doing with you all, my dear followers. Hopefully I’ll get to blog more as I keep getting used to how life is happening.

Anyway, I have to go. Uni starts tomorrow, even though I’m in this huge denial pit.

*hugs*

Nat

20.

Hello, guys! *insert peace sign emoji* What’s up? I’ve been seriously busy these past few weeks, with Uni and everything. (But that’s no excuse. I know. I just haven’t known what/how to write. It’s sad, I know)

But I’m here, that counts for something. *smiles*

I cannot believe I’m twenty years old (not while I am writing this post, but when it’s posted, I will be). Most of the people would spend their last hours of their teenage years partying/drinking with their friends. Instead, I’m blogging while I listen to Adele’s new album. And the past 2 days? Watching Marvel’s Jessica Jones. –I know, I know. I’m such a fun and interesting person to follow!-

My point is that, let’s be honest, most of the time this is me, trying to be/become an adult:

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(I know, right? I excel at this!)

Anyway, I had so many resolutions I wanted to have achieved by the time this day arrived. Needless to say, after everything that has happened to me this year, I’ve only been able to achieve 3 of them. Specifically:

3. Get my GPA up. Seriously, that is a must for me!

9. Develop an opinion.

10. Share said opinion with the world

(Still working on that last one!)

I know I have said these things before, but I mean it. Blogging helps. It’s a cathartic exercise. If I’m completely honest, I don’t even know how I feel most of the time.  I’ve slowly realized how I feel about many things and people, and have started to open up about them. Even if I haven’t blogged as much as I would want this year, I always find myself organizing my thoughts to understand them better and being able to write them down.

One of them, though, is the best advice I could take right now.

19. In general, to Keep moving forward.

I said it would be my motto for this year, and it has been. I have to admit this has been the hardest year of my life, and I’ve taken it surprisingly well. Of course I (and the rest of my family) have taken hits! But we’re survivors.

I should celebrate that I am alive, satisfied about what I’ve done during this past year, and thankful that I have the chance to make things better next year.

Happy birthday to me! 🙂

 

Humans adapt; so will I.

One of my favorite quotes (even if it’s from one of my not-so favorite books, Allegiant) is:

“Change, like healing, takes time.” 

While hard events are going on in your life, it is hard to imagine if things will ever be okay again, whether things changed for the better.

One of my Biology professors once told me every living thing has something it is good at, something that comes by instinct. He asked us what we thought our superpower -for lack of a better word -was. (Let’s be honest. It’s a good question. Most animals follow patterns, have a function on the environment. What do humans do on Earth? I’m sure I spent like five minutes trying to answer that question) Finally, he gave us the answer: Humans adapt to their environment, and change everything around them. (Not that it’s always a good thing!)

That’s the answer to my previous question. Things will be okay, because nothing is forever, and we can adapt to those changes. Life during this past month hasn’t been exactly easy, but we’ve been slowly adapting to this new way of life; my brother, my mom and I videochat with my dad every night, and we are cooperating way more with each other chore-wise.

Screenshot 2015-10-19 21.12.04Things have been specially hard on my mom. They have been together for 25 years… This has been a learning process for all of us. We’ve all had to learn something. We’re slowly becoming more independent, and life does go on, even if adapting to those changes is definitely not easy. I’ve decided I’ll do my best… (Especially if I want to get into graduate school close to him and my mom, in the future). I most definitely miss life as it was some months ago, but I still believe in what I wrote a year ago: Some things do not happen because of a reason in particular, but you must do your best with what you have and fight for what you want.

Wow, reading this post you might think: Whoa, Nat is going through a rough patch and there’s no positivity in her life! But that’s not exactly true. There have been some nice things in my life lately. Yesterday, for example, was a particularly good day. I had my ACS initiation and had a good time with my friends.

So, that’s how life goes: There are some good days, and some not so great. But it is like that for everyone. I’ll get used to it in time. And I’ll be here, like I always am, to tell my story. 🙂


TL;DR: I’ve been trying to get used to life after my dad had to move; it hasn’t been easy, but we’re all adapting to everything. Lately life has been nice, thanks to my friends, and hopefully I’ll still be here, blogging all about it. 🙂

PS: Yes, I got a new haircut. I did tell you about it on my last post but I didn’t show you all. 🙂

A much needed update

My last post was a month ago… so I really shouldn’t need to say that I had to skip the remainder of the weeks on Writing101 (I’m sorry, I really am. I was having so much fun!). Then again, things happened. (this post will explain) So many things did, and I had to take some time to just stop and think about how things are going to work now that my grandma has been gone for almost a month, and that my dad is working at Texas. (I miss him like crazy…it’s his birthday tomorrow, the first one where we won’t be together. It’s been two whole weeks.)

I’ve been through an adaptation period, so I might have been really cranky. Posting things during this past month would have meant angry posting -especially about my Physics lab. Ugh-  And that’s definitely not okay! My blog is my positive haven. My Twitter? Entirely a different thing. Some other, positive things have happened:

^^ I had really negative expectations about my Physics class… but I’m happy. My professor is seriously crazy, but he’s really passionate about this whole thing. (Kind of awkward, too, but that’s expected. I really like him.)

Well, this is it. A short one, But I owed it to you all.


P.S: I also owe you a picture of my new haircut, but I really must go and study.:D

xoxo, Nat

Procrastination.

I’m a professional procrastinator. You can ask anyone that has ever been close to me, and they’ll tell you exactly the same thing. This is why I chose this tweet for today’s Writing101 assignment:


To be honest, even to write this post is to procrastinate. I should be studying for all my classes (Especially Physics. *gulps*) … So in theory, procrastination is enhancing my creativity right now, while probably killing my grades. Oh well. Then again, when I am relaxed and do not have anything else to do, I tend to put off my blogging for later… I could even spend months without it. I am aware of how counterproductive procrastination can be, I just cannot stop doing it.

So I completely understand what our friend Grant is talking about on this tweet. I just found an essay I wrote about this topic during my freshman year… And I found this quote:

Life goes on, though, and if lessons are not learned, there will be repercussions. Getting fired from jobs and drifting away from people are some of the many things that could happen if this behavior is not corrected on time.

I still believe this (I might have written this to force myself to be productive during that school year), but it is so hard to break out of this cycle. During the week, I think: “All right, this shall be my weekend. I’ll be productive”, but when Fridays arrive, I just want to sleep and relax. This is a common feeling, but I don’t usually do anything about it. It worries me to no end.

Procrastination is somewhat of a defense mechanism, until it becomes horribly stressful. For example, I have around 3 exams these next two weeks, plus my association’s activities. I should be ahead on my classes. I don’t know why I do it, I don’t know if I’ll ever get over this, but I know I should do something about it. I just hope I do it in time… Preferably before I graduate. xD

Do you have any advice on how to overcome procrastination? I would seriously appreciate it!